Time

The time when nothing works out for you is tough. It is stressful when you have been one year without work. And then there is nothing ahead on the schedule. You log on to Facebook ... Look at what all others are doing all the stuff everyone is occupied with and then call people finding that where few can pull some minutes for you others are occupied and tell you that they will get back once free. I know there are things to uplift yourself but being at work does make one a bit better since it assures a lot of things will be OK. 

 Life is not easy for anyone on the earth. But i am probably reaching a point of no return. Although I could swallow a lot and put on a great act earlier but now it seems I have no control over myself too. Am I done with myself ? I cannot muster the strength to stand strong any longer no matter which field.... Career, Friends, Family almost everything.  

 It feels like there is a scar which never stops bleeding, it feels as ugly as it looks.

 I never expected things to come easy to me... there are trials.. there are tribulations. Too many hopes and dreams built up then brought down. Tears do not come as easy as it looks to others. The feeling of endless tears is not what anyone looks forward to each day. But there is always some timeline defined for everything... Is it ? For me there is no end to few things in life ... The word hope has lost its meaning now... there was a hope that someday it will all be for good. The hope of being loved as I always prayed for. The happiness, where I can actually feel happy n contented for a span of time. The hope of getting through the unending struggles. The hope that someday if not all atleast someone will understand me as a person. And many more hopes that I have already lost in the series of loosing.

 I still don't have good answers to a lot of questions asked. But someday I might never have to give any answers to anyone.

 I knew myself as a person who loved life long back. I don't want to give up on myself.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Happy Times :)

August is a bitter sweet month for me. It is my birth month  🎂  & birth month of some more special people. This month has colors of friendship  & brother sister love. But there is a lot of heart break attached to it too.   I will focus on the good especially on the writing front. We lose some we win some. Onward we go. Since childhood my birthday has always been a very special day for me. I start waiting for my birthday from the very next day the current one ends. I have tried to always make it special and memorable for me. But most of them did not turn out as I wished n tried for. But from past few years it comes with some sort of fear attached to it. It no more has the excitement it used to bring along.  Wish to get the "LIFE" back in my life.  It might need a lot of efforts and strength but u ltimately,  I decided to write about all of it because I think we could all probably use a reminder to be kind to ourselves. I hope to write something that hel
Read more

Emotional Violence ... Even against Men..!!! Do we really Know?

Image
Violence against women is talked about whether its physical, emotional, mental or sexual but wat about Men who suffer silently? It is easy to see some peoples visible injury, but what about those who are step by step destroyed with verbal and psychological abuse? Some things will never change, coz its fashionable to cry for violence against females. Though I fully agree the females need support ... but tilting the entire balance of law and society against the males is just killing a soul from words.Seeing this breed of men suffering and being the victim of emotional and verbal abuse is sad and equally disheartening as it is to see any woman suffer. A man just looking for peace at any price is becoming a prey and being held responsible for all those things which were not even intended ever.  Some woman can actually create that sympathy and drama worldwide. The fear tactics are used to keep the Man under control. Society is a weapon for every such woman cos she knows where and
Read more

Choices..!!

The idea of love is very rosy but be very assertive about your self-respect and dignity. Do not ever allow yourself to be shattered just because you are in love. If there is no mutual affection and respect in a relationship then it would never thrive. Everything else fades away with time. Adjusting, compromising with yourself on various grounds in hope of a blissful haven is foolish. Unconditional love is a silly thought. There is no such thing. Every act of love seeks something in return and if one doesn’t love oneself one can’t expect love from others. What you give to others is never enough and is often thrown back at you as an object that supposedly smothered them. Never give away all of yourself to anyone. Never. Mistakes/failures are always very good teachers. Each failure, each rejection is a stepping stone.  They teach you lessons that you need to learn, strengthening and resurrecting you in the process. It makes you reach inside and know yourself better.  No school or colle
Read more